If you have problems in your marriage, do not wait too long before seeking professional help. Marriage counseling can be very effective, especially if you seek it in time.
Start by finding a consultant who specializes in this type of therapy. You may need to meet with more than one to find the right one for you. It is important that both you and your partner feel comfortable with your chosen therapist, so search until you find the right one. Happy marriages are not made on
matrimonial sites or the marriage bond itself. It's made by the couples.
Do you need a marriage consultation?
Determine which of the statements apply to you, your partner, or your marriage.
- You got married at an early age;
- You have not completed your secondary education;
- You are on a low income;
- You profess a different religion from that of your partner;
- Your parents are divorced;
- You often criticize each other;
- You take a defensive position towards your partner;
- You tend to distance yourself from your partner;
- You feel contempt and anger towards each other;
- You find that communication between you is insufficient;
- There is infidelity, addiction or violence in your marriage.
If most of the allegations apply to you, then you are statistically at high risk of divorce. This does not mean that divorce is inevitable. But it may mean that you need to work harder to keep in touch. A marriage counselor can help you with this.
The effectiveness of marriage counseling
The most researched and effective form of exposure is the motion-oriented therapy for couples. Studies show that this therapy has a long-term effect, and that it is also useful for couples in which the partners are of different ethnic and cultural backgrounds.
Which couples receive the most from marriage counseling?
There are signs by which you can judge whether counseling will be useful for your marriage. Counselors argue that different types of couples have different benefits from marriage counseling. If you fall into any of the following categories, it is very likely that you will benefit from a meeting with a marriage counselor:
- Young couple;
- A couple in which the partners are still in love with each other;
- Who are open to therapy and change;
- Non-sexist and egalitarian couple;
- A couple in which the partners look at themselves and pay attention to their shortcomings.
Which couples receive the least from marriage counseling?
If your marriage falls into any of the following categories, counseling may not be helpful to you. This does not mean giving up, but you must have realistic expectations.
- The partners are closed to the possibilities that could save their marriage;
- One of the partners is addicted to alcohol, drugs or pornography;
- Couples who wait too long before seeking help;
- One of the spouses has been divorced;
- One of the partners attends the sessions but does not actively participate in them.
Solutions learned from happy couples
If you think there is a problem in your marriage, don't wait. Seek help as soon as possible. Set a budget and take time for therapy. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to get your relationship back in good shape. Find a professional marriage counselor or join a marriage course as soon as the alarming signs appear.